Tonight it feels as if a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I don't know if the books and interview evaluation were worrying me that much or if it's just my moods cycling again. This morning I was still a little stressed but generally in a good mood. We worked on his books, ate lunch, ran to town to buy a new door knob (because the other one unexpectedly fell apart in my hand), and then I took a nap this afternoon (I have been having a horrible time trying to sleep lately).
When I woke up I was feeling lazy so we ordered pizza and sandwiches from Domino's (you've got to try those sandwiches if you haven't yet. I had habenero chicken and it's amazing). Grandma joined us in the kitchen for a pizza party and the kids drank pop while Grandma and I each had a beer. It was soooo much fun! I haven't laughed and visited like that with the family I live with in a long time. It reminded me how much we enjoy each other. I think that a weekly pizza party (or some kind of party) needs to be fit into the calendar.
Tonight I feel amazing. The overwhelming sense of loss and anxiety is gone (at least for now). Outside the air smells like mint and green, growing things. The sheep are quietly munching. The dogs are asleep by my feet (and they're touching each other and haven't fought in days!!!). My oldest son is watching a movie with me and asking questions about canning jars. My youngest son is in Grandma's room reading stories. The middle child is camping up near Stanley with his Grandpa, uncles, and male cousins (I hope they're having a blast).
Chris is scheduled for his interview evaluations on Monday. The Snake River Stampede starts on Tuesday. We work the Stampede on Saturday evening, selling concessions for the county 4-H program (I have to add a note that this is the most amazing and generous gift from the rodeo to the 4-H program. We usually make a ton of money and it's all due to the generosity of the rodeo board and the hard work of our county 4-H members and volunteers). Next Monday we begin setting up for fair- and it's all a blur for the rest of that week!
I've been stressing so much, and now it seems that the stress is ending and the fun is about to begin. I pray (truly) that things are going to be as good as they seem. What a life we lead! We are so lucky to live where we do, surrounded by friends and family and in a community of people who care about us and forgive us when we're a bit off our game. :-) I'm so in love with my friends and family at the moment they probably wouldn't believe it if I told them! If any of you are reading this- thanks for being you and putting up with me! I love you all!